Saturday, August 21, 2004

Musing of a Perplexed Father.

People say, "Oh, you have a beautiful girl," and oh, you're such a pretty little princess. But you know, to be perfectly and utterly honest, newborns don't look like anything other than newborns. They're like these miniature, twitchy, unisex human beings who look like puppets when they cry because their heads are thrown back, the tougue curls, and there's no teeth. Like a little Muppet. Don't get me wrong, I think she's cute and all that, but newborns have this look that's so foreign and alien. Just tiny and frail and unusually loud.

The other thing that's throwing me off is her Boo-Boo. I call it a Boo-Boo on this blog because some pervert will Google word combinations like baby and the medical term for Boo-Boo for some gratification and find this site. I'm not comfortable with that. I want people to read my blog with both hands on the keyboard.


Her Boo-Boo is perplexing mainly because I don't have one. With Alex, his Wee-Wee was not that foreign, just smaller than usual. But with Zoe, her Boo-Boo is only the second real-life Boo-Boo I've had to handle, though the first one is handled wayyy different than the second. It's just a strange sight to change a diaper, and it's not there. No, something else is there. And it's not external, but internal. Look, God. I don't know how to clean that, dude. So, I'll just wipe it gently, and that's that. But I asked my wife, who said that that's fine, that we I have to wipe in-between Alex's butt cheeks for offending material, wouldn't that get lodged in her Boo-Boo as well? I dunno. Girl parts are weird.

Zoe's legs are still pretty cocked in her fetal position, like she's been on sitting on a chair for far too long and her legs are stuck that way. I'm not worried about it, I just forget babies do that. I forgot Alex did that. It's like refreshing my memories. Sigh. I'll be up till 2am, and then my wife will be on baby watch. I don't mind really, I'm more of a night person anyhow.

I promise I won't blog anymore tonight though.

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