New parenthood is such a new and interesting experience for me. Never in my life had I had to block the urine stream of anyone so that it wouldn't douse me with its golden splendorness. It happened to me, ladies and gentlemen, for the first time last night when I was changing him. While I was taking off his diaper, Alex proceeded to pee his warm goodness for a few seconds before I deflected his pee with my hand, and making it all shower back on poor Alex. But in those few destructive moments, he managed to pee on his shirt, his mittens, my hand, the towels, and the neighbor's dog. Well, maybe not. So we clean him up, put a diapey on him (get used to me altering names of actual things to sound cuter), and within a few minutes his butt vibrates soundly and a wet sounding squirt indicates that indeedy, he needs another diaper change.

Yesterday my wife had the same misfortune, while changing him out of his soiled diapers, Alex decided to show Mommy his newfound talent of pooing, so he had to have a change of clothes and a new diaper.

Ironically, it was just a few days ago when we decided that he was off breastmilk and on formula, that we were worried about his lack of Number Two. Apparently, little babies can't process formula as easily as breastmilk, so it would take a couple days before their little digestive systems will convert that into poo. So finally when he did grow a tail, we were quite the estastic parents. "Yay! He pooped!"

And now we're like, "Please don't poop on Mommy."