Bad Accountant!

I do the accounting around the house mostly because I'm better with Quicken and am pretty strict about keeping receipts, but evidently I'm not doing that great of a job because I forgot to enter a expenditure in my wife's checkbook and now she has 74 cents in her account. As for me, a stroke of weird luck when my gas bill that was due on Tuesday come back to me for shortage of postage - 37 cents short. But what had happened was that the hotel that I booked in Vancouver actually charged me for it, which I thought was pretty weird. Usually they hold your Visa number so that they can charge no-shows, but actually taking out the owed amount was really strange to me, because most hotels have you pay after you check out. Those crazy Canadians! But anyway, had I remembered postage, my checking account would've bounced as well. So, my wife took this opportunity to tell me that God worked in mysterious ways.

Like he would tell my wife to steal all my stamps so that I wouldn't have any.

Then when she was standing over me, she burped silently but I caught wind of it, and she said that God was working again, in his mysterious way. I agreed and said, "Yes, perhaps a puppy somewhere lived because I smelt the 3 hour old sausages on your breath."

This is our life together.