I'm going blind.

Due to the anxiety approaching the wedding day, which is a week away, I am slowly losing my sight, I've determined. Everything's slightly blurry, and all the excessive rubbing in the world wouldn't rid it. I don't know what happened, but as the days approach closer and closer, my head gets more and more cloudy as well. It seems as if there is a fog that has descended over me, especially as more money and planning goes into the wedding day.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely still wanna get hitched, I love my sweetie very very much, but I'm just nervous about this year in general. Marriage, Vegas, Baby, just a lot going on in this year. Job change... God god, I've gone blind! And yes, technically it is still possible for me to type because I'm a writer. I know the keyboard better than I know female anatomy. Hmm. Too bad for my fiance. Hee hee.

It could be that my vision is cloudy because I'm lacking sleep. That's an interesting theory as well. Hopefully, the sunshine of my life will shed some warmth light onto it and clear it right up.

That, or sex would work.

With my fiance, of course.

Um. I'm done, I think.

With baby news today, the baby seems to be moving a lot inside my fiance, and she's really enjoying it. On the flip side, being pregnant and being on her feet as much as she is, she's quite fatigued when she gets off of work. And today, she got a little upset at home while I was at work (not at anyone), and broke some stuff, and the thought came up - should she go to part time to relieve some of that fatigue? That, of course, as anything inevitably will, led to money management, and by the end of the night, we have more questions than answers.

So, that's fun.

Money sucks. It's ironic that it's something of value that ends up devaluing so many things.

Did the old wive's tests for the baby's gender last night, some of which included hanging a thread over the baby to see if it moved in circles or back and forth. Well, the results have come back and we're definitely sure we're having a....

...50/50 chance. Something like 52 percent girl and 48 percent boy anyway. So much for old wive's tales.

One of the questions amused me, asking if the father of the baby gained weight along with the mother, or stayed the same.

That would be the "father gained weight," thank you very much.

I swear, we ate so much food during lunch today. She had a slice of pizza, a small order of Caesar's salad, and three stuffed crazy bread. Not to be outdone, I had two slices of pizza, ten spicy chicken wings, and one stuffed crazy bread. I was then taken to the village in a wheelbarrow and roasted over an open fire with an apple in my mouth. Sympathy eating? I don't know what the explanation is. Perhaps I'm just gaining weight for all the weight I'll be losing (along with sleep) when the baby arrives.

I've been having a lot of anxiety about marriage and the baby lately, weird dreams. Haven't changed my mind or anything, just a pretty major change in my life. I'm a creature of habit, what can I say?

I'm thinking of putting together a montage for us for the ceremony. Because I just do things like that.

Peace out, yo.

Hee hee.

Did something I didn't think I was capable of doing today, being totally responsible and self-motivated. I called a few officiants (grudgingly, I hate cold-calling anyone) and when I got my first price quote, I was a little shocked. He charged 100 bucks. Which, in all reality, isn't too bad considering that he does what he does... Anyway, I called a church and then I sought it out, and met with Rev. Pete Rhea (pronounced Ray), who seemed like a pretty nice guy. It was strange arranging this with him, now I kinda understand the kind of apprehension and unsureness of people when they call me about videography. It's all new to them as well, and there's no experience that readies you for something like this. Anywho, got a Reverend for the smallish-supposed-to-be-cheap wedding ceremony, and our initial intention of keeping it simply has officially become major.

And I haven't even tinkered with his sermon yet. Or spiel. Whatever the reverend reads during the ceremony.

In a couple of weeks we should get another ultrasound, which I think we kinda need because it seems so strange to be expecting a guest and not knowing what the guest looks like. We just know that the guest will be staying with us indefinitely. Won't pay for food or lodging, and will probably give us a lot of crap during the first year.

I'm sorry, the pun presented itself, and I had to run with it.

So yes, the official moving situation now is, "We're not." We might just spend the money on the baby, and other assorted baby-related things. What with the wedding and our unique family structure (the three cats), moving is rather problematic for us.

By the way, yes, I did take that picture below.

We're going to try switching sides on the bed tonight. She has to sleep with her body pillow on her left side (which is what you're supposed to do while you're with baby, I guess), and I thought, well, if you switch sides with me, you can look at me sleeping instead of looking away from me.

And we would never know the difference.

This news is a few days old, but on Monday FC and I went to the courthouse to get the marriage license. It was a very clerical experience, filled with lots of form, uh, filling, and we got the list of officiants we can call and get for our wedding date. We also tried looking at places that were cheaper than our place, and does accept three cats, but no one in town that we knew of had that to offer.

Later that night, I played Warcraft II on my mac and FC got mad at me because I was ignoring her, and she was right. I spend the later part of that night thinking about how much I really loved my FC and how much I should spend more time with her, because I think it's theraputic for the both of us.

So, it looks like war will be coming down upon Americans, and our baby could be born in the middle of a war. There's another reason why the world will hate America. Seems like we're a country who was the favorite son of the world, winning the world over with our charming personality and our good looks, but we're becoming the spoilt little brat that will meet a demise that we have manufactured. But enough political rantings, I just hope that the baby will never have to experience any of the images on TV. Too young to know about war, because the baby has to learn about love first.

FC felt the baby move a bunch yesterday, and I was wondering if it was possible to hear the baby. So I got my video equipment out, and the mics to see if I could pick up any gurgling sound or the like. All I found out was that if you still a wireless mic in FC's bellybutton, the speakers will screech in some weird form of feedback, so that wasn't very exciting.

I started petting FC's tummy and talking to it, and sometimes it does occur to me that if someone talked to my leg and petted it, I would be weirded out. Slightly.

The preparations for the mini-wedding is getting to be a major thing. On top of trying to fit people in the house, I've got to worry about people with no transportation possibly coming from Renton and Redmond, and also have to worry about working at 5 in the freaking A.M. the next day after the wedding. That's not fun. But I can't really ask for it off because 2 weeks after this, we're going to Vegas and that's asking for a favor too.

FC is a sweetie. I downloaded Kenny Loggins' "Return to Pooh Corner" for her and she was really enjoying it, and then started to cry a little. Then I felt bad for downloading it because I was such a bully. But she likes that song for the baby.

We went window shopping for the baby today, and there were tons of really cute stuff. Toys "R"Us had a bunch of stuffed animals that were too soft to name, and a puppet monkey who was just illin' to be chillin'. The Monkey's arms were posed open palms down, so all I could do to amuse FC was to make the monkey spin imaginary turntables while I beatboxed. It was pretty fun. We looked at more baby furniture and I got a little cranky at how expensive some of the stuff is, stuff that will be grown out of in two years. Of course, if Trenchcoat and Syrinx got busy, then I could pass it on to him!

Trenchcoat is screaming down the street.

But anyway, we didn't buy anything today, but looking at the baby stuff really makes the thought of fatherhood seem rather cool.

Well, we've decided on a wedding date and we're going to have it in our home. It's going to be March 29, a Saturday, probably in the mid afternoon, and the only criteria to be invited is to bring some food, and forget the gifts! Yes, a potluck reception is all we can afford... But yay! Everyone is invited to see us get hitched!