I actually experienced the physical urge to hold a baby today, after looking at some baby clothes. So little and soft, they were, tempting me with its cuteness of rounded curves on the little animals and the soft colors. I actually wanted a baby in that right then so I could smile at it. Man, you'd think I was manufacturing estrogen.

FC bought our baby its first toy today, a very happy little fella that probably cost more than it should have. But I have to admit, the little guy's cute. Will post a pic later.

Um, have to go to bed soon. I swear, FC's sleeping about 10 hours everyday. Probably more. Her tummy is starting to show. Baby!

I was driving back from JL's school in the car with FC (and no JL, we just had to drop off a paper and she was off with her dad) and I suggested,

"Hey, you want a blizzard?"

"Ooooh Yeah!" said FC, with very much the same enthusiasium as a kid with a sweet tooth.

And when we did get there, I ordered onion rings for myself, looked at FC, and she had this look that still makes me smile right now as I'm thinking of it -- a look of cheekiness and envy, suggestion and pure joy. I enjoyed another for her and she actually ate most of it, something she wouldn't do if she wasn't pregnant. She can't do chocolate now, so she got a strawberry-banana blizzard and had it all.

Her appettite's been improving and has returned with the wrath that no one in this house has ever seen! She's still avoiding chocolate and chicken, but overall, she's been eating a lot better. She's also quite emotional, so I do watch my jokes around her because I have a tendency to be callous and slightly imprevious to good taste. If the idea comes to me, it goes unfiltered out of my mouth sometimes. I'm still not sparing her on the bullying bit, still tickling her any chance I get. Something about her screaming that makes me all happy and warm inside.

This week is a little harsh on her, her work schedule has three 5am to 2pm shifts and it's making her tired, throwing her internal clock into chaos. On the other hand, here I am staying up till 2 in the morning and waking up at 9, confused and slightly incoherent. We did get to watch "Unfaithful" today, and we really liked it. All the principals were great, and the director Adrian Lynne is good as well, doing movies the way they're meant to be made -- not patronizing the audience with unnecessary stuff, practicing restraint and making a sexy little flick.

I was practicing my baby reading skills today, reading A.A. Milne out loud to myself. I'm not sure, but I might be enjoying the books a little more than I'd expect the baby to. Oops.

Okay, I shouldn't discuss this with friends, but I'm just curious. We were pretty set on getting married in Vegas, but because my mom made a comment about not being invited to go to my brother's swearing in at the courthouse, I've been entertaining the thought of just getting married in Bellingham, and being able to invite my mom, JL, and my friends. I'm going back and forth on this, because the another reason for all this worry is because it will cost money to get hitched in Vegas, as it would here. I think it'll both come out to be the same, but I'm just not sure. FC and I have talked about it, and she doesn't mind going either way, we're sorta hinging it on the visit to my mum's next week. If it goes well, we will consider a ceremony here, and if it doesn't go as well, maybe we'll just fly to Vegas and get it done by Elvis. What do you folks think?

FC told me about a girl at work, Faye, who has been pretty pregnant for quite some time now. Well, I did notice she was getting pretty huge, but FC told me that she heard that Faye is now on bedrest, because she's gained so much weight. Average pregnancy will pack up to 30 pounds, which should be healthy, but Faye packed on 110 pounds or something like that. She started off being 110 and is now at 220? Details are sketchy for me, because I don't listen too well, but that's just absurd. That's like having my FC's younger daughter in her. Man alive. I guess she has no choice but to do a C-section. Wow.

FC relayed to me that today, while she was reading, "What to Expect When You're Expecting" on the Laz-Z-Boy during her lunch at home (while I was sleeping) she felt something brush up against her tummy -- on the inside. Seems like the baby is giving mom a friendly nudge That's cool!

I started talking to FC's tummy, which is rather strange because it doesn't reply. I guess it's too soon to have a legitimate conversation so soon, what with having no vocabulary and all.

Then I started reading Winnie the Pooh out loud, the good original novel by A.A. Milne, not Disney's horribly santized and general version, mind you. Reading about the guys playing Poohsticks, and how Eeyore was a Poohstick himself. I like that story.

FC's reading up a lot about the baby, feeling pregnant today she is.

Sorry the comments aren't working. I will now sacrifice a dried mango slice to the internet gods and pray for the best.

Just got off the phone with my Mom, and it seems that she has begun to come to terms with my relationship with my Fiance. She's been thinking about it, and talking to my aunt about it, and it seems that she is still a little disappointed at me, but I have to reassure her that this is the best relationship I have and ever be in, and I'm so happy with my FC that it seems criminal that we're having so much fun.

She wants to meet my FC now, which should adequately freak my FC out now. I think it'll be fine, but you try telling her that.

I asked my mom if she's thought of names, and she said that it was pretty much up to us. I asked her if she could think of the Chinese names and she told me that her head was going to explode. With no humorous undertones at all. So, I'm letting her pace it, the whole acceptance thing, but I'm glad she came around and is willing to give it a shot.

My brother however, seems to have turned it into an entirely different matter...

Had a dream about the baby, I think it's seeping more into my subconcious now. Had a dream that FC was holding it in her arms and me thinking, "Man, the baby's darker than I am."

I forgot the rest.

FC and I have booked our trip to Vegas, and we're very excited about that. She can't go on rides because little babies in tummies don't prefer to be smashed about in the womb, but there seems to be an abundance of things to do in Vegas. We're going to be staying at the Stratosphere, which is cool even though we can't ride the Stratosphere's Big Top (a vertical ride that propels wayyy up, and drops you like a Health Plan). There's also lions or tigers on exhibit, and FC was really stoked about the cats with their big, man-ripping paws.

And there's a M and M's exhibit. Mmm. Candy.

We're slightly worried about the secondhand smoke in the casinos, but I imagine they'd have some really high grade air conditioning to circulate the casinos. If the casinos in Vegas were all smoked filled, I wouldn't imagine anyone would be interested in going.

So Vegas will be our last adult-oriented trip in a while, but we don't intend to see showgirls or anything. Something about half-naked women with headgear and heavy makeup that just doesn't appeal to me. FC has shown no interest in Chippendales either...

FC has been worried lately because she hasn't felt like she's been pregnant, which includes nausea, loss of appetite, and big tumminess. She's worried that there might be something wrong with the baby, but I tell her that it's probably okay. The body will signal in a grand way if something is indeed wrong with the baby, and it's kinda odd, really. She can't eat a lot of days and she's not having any fun foods, but now that she can, she's worried that the baby's not well. Being sick seems like a healthy indication that the baby is doing its thing.

We looked at some baby clothes yesterday, even if it is too early for that. FC and I were agreeing that baby's clothes shouldn't always either be blue or pink, we think that it's rather annoying that most clothing manufacturers do that. This may have something to do with babies looking androgynous when they're pups, and most people will mistake your boy for a girl and vice versa. But the color thing's moot compared to the graphics on the clothing. So if I have a boy, it will be either trucks, bulldozers, baseball, fire engines or US Marines? (Ok, I didn't really see any Marines.) And if I have a girl, it will be either butterflies, flowers, or sassy little words? (Like Princess, or Pretty, or Girl Power.)

Anyway, we decided that we would either choose neutral colors like yellow or green or gray, and try to choose little graphics that are animals. Animals are cool, and they don't declare its gender in such a generalized way. Sure, I do want my child to have a sexual identity, but man alive, you don't see me wearing things with heavy machinery or sports related logos on it.

But anyone who knows me will see that I don't really care what I wear. Usually it's as cool as I can afford, without subscribing to an establishment, or corporate entity. Actually, I do have a thing with dress shirts, oddly enough. Well, enough of that. You'll see my baby in a dress outfit all the time now.